I’m 39. When I met Doc we were both wet-behind-the-ears 18 year old freshmen in college. That was 21 years ago, and I fell hard for him. He was a pre-med, and expected to be an ophthalmologist. But he had an instructor in one of his courses, who was not an MD himself, whose sole purpose seemed to be to steer his students out of medicine as a career. This guy managed to undermine Doc's decision about becoming a doctor. Which is ridiculous. So he got his B.S. and then a Ph.D. and taught medicine instead. Which just means we’ve been through a LOT of schooling together.
After teaching for a scant six years, and always having that wistful look in his eyes as his students moved on through their medical school training, I told him he should follow his dream. It only took a little reassuring to convince him. I could tell he really wanted to.
So 21 years ago, I didn’t expect to be living the student life again, but here we are. Doc started his 3rd year of med school last week, which is when they start doing rounds in the hospital (read gone all the time). Unlike most students, we have two middle-age kids in tow. It’s a vastly different life than I thought I’d be living at this age, but it’s a good one. And I’m excellent at frugal living, so better me than your Paris Hilton high-maintenance type. They’d wither away. But I can take it.
20 years ago I thought I’d have at least 4 or 5 kids by now, and have always wished for more.
But I didn’t dream that I’d be a super-senior part-time flight attendant who only has to work 3-4 days a month. And I didn’t dream that I’d get to have traveled to all the places I have. And I didn’t imagine that I’d be as happy on the inside as I’d always tried to look on the outside. I didn’t imagine the wondrous friends who would become part of my life. I didn’t know what interests and abilities I’d discover in myself.
I don't think anyone's life turns out how they planned. But I believe that things can turn out better than expected. In my case it’s been devilishly hard at times, but I’ve hung in there and am reaping the sweet joys of enduring difficult times. There’s something about challenges in life that, if we allow them to, seem to be an essential part of the refining and polishing process. Enduring is good for the soul.
How has your life differed from your expectations and dreams of the past, and what are your hopes for the next ten years?
♥
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6 comments:
That was really neat to read, Blue. It's interesting to realize that life can take us all sorts of places. Thank you for sharing. If I feel up to it, I'll share some changes of plans, too. But I may have to wait until our income situation is resolved. It's hard for me to be too introspective right now.
Ha! My expectations 20, 15, or even 10 years ago were wildly different, as you can imagine!
Hey Blue! You're and awesome wife. Doc is lucky to have you. Keep it up.
blue-- I didn't realize you were a flight attendant-- no wonder you're always traveling to such wonderful places.
My life is pretty boring because it's very similar to how I would have imagined it when I was a teenager and a newlywed. I love your last paragraph and think it's really true. The last year of our lives have been pretty hard at times (my 3 yo was seriously ill for six months) but I know we've gained a lot of closeness and perspective as a result of that experience.
You surely must be over exagerating your age. You can't be that old! Of course, if you have to "middle aged kids" (I read that "in their 50s") then perhaps your much, much older. . . and have some astounding genes ('cause neither you nor Bunch nor. . Gator(?) appear to be anywhere near 50).
I expected to have a covey of kids underfoot by now. Not so. Quite happy with where my life has gone, too :)
Thank you for your thoughts!
Not that any age you might claim to be is really "that old" or even "old."
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