Mini Vacation

I know yesterday I said I'd be discussing The Drama Triangle next, but I interrupt your programming with a little side post.


This week we took the kids out of school for a day and went camping in Goblin Valley, hiking through Little Wild Horse slot canyon, and visited Arches National Park again.  And seriously, I have to say, If there's a state with more amazing natural beauty than Utah, I want to hear about it.  


Since I'm the "keeper of the photos", I decided to post some here for my family so they can see them.  Good memories!

Gator climbed up on the rocks behind our campsite

Goblin Valley -- we had it all to ourselves.

Our one family pic...found a rock to use the camera timer on. We were the ONLY ONES THERE...so we had no options for all of us to be in a picture except this shot.

 It's hard to see how precarious this rock was that I'm on.

It's like Utah's own little Easter Island.

This looks so much like a great and spacious building to me!

Such a gorgeous setting to camp in.

The backdrop to our campsite

Hoodooville!

This was taken at sunrise with the light shining on the face of the rocks unlike all the others which were taken at dusk.

Kids spanning the rocks in Little Wild Horse Slot Canyon

My boys. This riverbed was flooded not too long ago in the recent rains...and of course the slots were carved by water over eons.

My family

Little Wild Horse Slot Canyon...my little Bunch is scrambling up to join me.

Bunch taking a break on the Little Wild Horse Slot Canyon hike 

Path through Little Wild Horse Slot Canyon

Classic Little Wild Horse Slot Canyon scene 

Hiking through Little Wild Horse Slot Canyon

Pretty spectacular hiking in Arches National Park

Kids checking out some of the CRYPTOBIOTIC SOIL that you mustn't disturb!

The Fam

Double Arch in Arches National Park

Arches National Park. I just held the camera out the window whilst driving.

Boundaries

Hi internet buddies!


I've decided to write a series of posts on some of the things I'm learning right now, because I have no idea who else might benefit from them, but I know that they're exceptionally important concepts, and since I'm paying lots of money to acquire this knowledge, I thought I'd pass it along to, you know, SHARE THE LOVE. 


As I mentioned in my last post, I've been wading through depression the past few months. In response to this, I finally found a therapist to work with, and she has been amazing at teaching me things that I, as it turns out, really didn't understand or know much about. Which begs the question, what was I paying all those other therapists for all those years? Because I can tell you one thing, I don't just sit there talking about my past. It's like I'm enrolled in a course that is filling my mind with new insights and truths at every appointment.


During my first appointment, my therapist asked me to go get the book Boundaries: Where You End and I Begin by Anne Katherine, and to read it with a high-lighter in hand, noting anything that stood out for me.  So I did.  And then I wondered how I managed to get this far in life without hearing about the whole concept of boundaries anywhere along the way. Why don't they teach this in school?!


Having nicked just the very surface of this concept, I'm now convinced that the ability to establish and maintain healthy personal boundaries is FOUNDATIONAL...that it's the base of the whole pyramid of every relationship we have in life.  Without them, nothing else works very well.  


So even though having me read a book on boundaries seemed like an odd request in the moment, I realized later that it was the perfect place to start.  After finishing the book, I spent hours doing research online to further my understanding of this elemental topic...because really, everything else rests upon this concept. 


So if you want to learn about how to establish and maintain healthy boundaries, or if you don't have any idea what that even means, find a book (there are any number of them...check your library or search a bookstore), or go online and start doing some reading.  Within a few hours, you will have  a much stronger understanding of the role healthy boundaries play in all human interactions, and can start improving this aspect of your life.  


Here are some of the links I read, but there are tons if you do an online search.

• Setting Healthy Boundaries: Allowing the True Self to Emerge 
• Boundaries in the Family
• Do You Need Help in Understanding Boundaries? (Why, yes. Yes I do.)
• Establish Boundaries That Honor You
• How Good Are Your Personal Boundaries? (a free online quiz)

A search on any variation of the terms "healthy boundaries" "establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries" etc. will return an endless supply. Once you're familiar with this concept, you'll be able to start changing how some of the less-healthy relationships in your life operate. 

Next up: The Drama Triangle.  

Eating my words

I ended my last post with:

I hardly ever blog anymore, as you've probably noticed.  This place was once invaluable as an outlet while I healed and overcame things in my past. I have been so happy for a while now that the need for "blog therapy" has kind of diminished.  It may pick up in the future, or just stay sporadic as I feel inspired to write.  But no matter what, thanks, dear readers, for hanging in with me through all the twists and turns this patch of cyberspace has taken over the years.  We'll see what the future brings!

...and then promptly fell into a hole, which I still haven't climbed out of in the past couple months. This time the depression has been considerably more severe than previous episodes. I deactivated my Facebook account, damaged or broke some important relationships, and am still struggling to claw my way back out of the dark.  

I still don't feel like talking to anybody, but am working on things.  Once I have some healthy boundaries established, and have solidified the skills needed to keep them there, I hope to re-engage with people. Meanwhile, I do feel exceptionally grateful for the kindness, and in some cases, extraordinary generosity, of people who care about me. It's hard, feeling like I'm letting people down, and don't deserve any of their compassion. But I hope one day they'll know how much they mean to me, and that mattering to me will mean something useful.