Austin

Last summer, a family moved into the neighborhood with 3 small boys. The oldest child, Austin, was in first grade, and his younger brothers weren't in school yet.

They were a kind of rough family from the looks of things on their property and the stories I heard. I never met his parents, though though I saw them outside a couple of times. The three year old was reportedly very crazy, and he just ran wild...hitting, kicking, biting etc. He once wielded a knife on Gator and another neighbor boy (who were 5 years his senior). The children were largely unsupervised at home, living a kind of lawless life. The three year old would just walk into houses of neighbors at times, even if they weren't home. He let the neighbor's gerbil out of it's cage during one such visit.

Regardless of the trajectory his younger brother seemed to be on in life, Austin was a remarkably good boy, all things considered. He rode the school bus with Bunch & Gator. Many mornings, including several when it was below freezing and snowing like crazy, he would be out at the bus stop 30 - 45 minutes early. When they first moved in, before a picture of his homelife had started to emerge, Austin would routinely stop at our house at that hour. I deeply regret that, instead of inviting him in (for a couple of reasons, including the fact that I hadn't met his parents and I wouldn't let my own children go into homes of people I don't know, and wasn't sure how they'd feel about him being inside my home), I told him that the kids are practicing their lessons and such at that time of day, and they'd be out when it was time to leave.

After a few months, I started to get a sense of what kind of environment Austin must be living in from the stories the kids brought home about playing with him and being on the bus together. I tried to help Bunch & Gator treat him with an extra measure of compassion and sensitivity. It's hard to be friends with someone like Austin at first. He doesn't necessarily come with the set of social skills and acoutrements that most kids want in a friend. But he was a sweet boy, and I grew increasingly fond of him. I wanted him to feel welcome, and that ours was a home that he could count on if he ever needed a soft spot to land. I know how important that can be for a kid like Austin...he's a lot like I was at his age.

For the past month or two, Austin has been afraid to walk home alone from the bus. He's only 4 houses away from us, but he took to asking my kids if they'd walk him there. His reason, he claimed, was fear of "getting run over by a truck." We essentially live on a cul-de-sac with very little traffic.

One day a couple months ago, when it was snowing like crazy, he showed up at the bus wearing dark sunglasses. It wasn't bright out, and I really wanted to figure out if he was wearing them for a reason or just for fun. He said he had a headache, so I asked him if I could see his cool glasses. He took them off and let me look at them, and I gratefully noticed that his face was fine underneath them. But he said his head hurt, and that he'd hit it on something. He was out in the snow without gloves, so I ran home and gave him a spare pair to wear. Then I zipped his coat up and helped him don the gloves. He always seemed very grateful for any kindness shown him.

I suggested to Gator one lazy afternoon a month or so ago that he see if Austin could come over to play. Gator was afraid to ask, but finally got the courage up to go over. Austin's mother came to the door and told Gator that Austin wasn't allowed to play on school days.

Last week, Austin got off the bus one day and his coat was soaked through and filthy. He was dragging it along, and at first, before I realized that it was already wet and dirty, I called out to him to pick it up so it wouldn't get wet. When I saw it's condition, I wasn't sure if he'd catch it for getting his coat so wet and dirty, so I asked if he had a washing machine at home. "My mom's kind of sick" was his reply. So I asked if I could wash it and send it over later. He readily agreed to this, and then when Bunch took it over later no one answered the door. We gave it to him the next morning before he got on the bus. I hoped that didn't cause him any problems at home.

While I was flying this past week, Austin's family suddenly moved away. I had no idea this was happening till tonight, and they're gone now. Austin told Bunch & Gator on Thursday that they were moving, and he would be at a different school. Sure enough, they did the skeedaddle that day.

Over the past few months, I've grown increasingly fond of Austin, and hoped that he'd be around for a long time, so that we could be a bright spot in his life. If he were available, I'd have adopted him in a heartbeat and made him part of our family. I have no idea where he is now, or what kind of life he's going to end up having. I hope he knows that he's cared for. I hope that he always gravitates to those people in his path who have his best interests at heart, and that those moments will be enough to carry him through the challenges of a difficult childhood. I hope I see him again some day. I hope he's safe. My heart's a little bit broken tonight over him. Him and all the other Austins of the world. ♥