Reading The Pioneer Woman

So last Wednesday my sister-in-law and her 4 year old planned to meet me at the King’s English for Ree's book signing, which I've already written about. But there was no way my nephew would survive the wait. We didn’t have tickets, and were told they were gone. I was MOst diSPleASed with this information, because I had wanted to meet Ree for years!

In my anticipation I’d had, what I thought at the time was, a brilliant idea: I would make a batch of my scrumdiddilyumptious English Toffee, since she was coming to The King’s English. But I wouldn’t stop there…no, I would make it into a thick BLOCK of toffee, 5x7 inches, like a card! And then I would write her a note in white chocolate on it expressing the true feelings of my heart. It would be far better than a Hallmark. In fact, my toffee cards would become all the rage, Hallmark would ask me to author a whole line of Toffee Greeting Cards. See, I told you it was brilliant.

Anyway, I had gone ahead and made this toffee card, and I had hoped to give it to her.

I now confess that I’m a bit embarrassed by my little offering, heartfelt though it was. See, it hadn’t occurred to me that others of Ree’s minions would be showering her with loads of ultra-fabbo gifts (I have always lacked vision that way). And their gifts wouldn't be of questionable origins (ie: is it sanitary? did she wash her hands? [FWIW I absolutely made it to the highest standards of cleanliness!]), like, for example, a card made from toffee and chocolate in a carefully homemade, foil-wrapped box without a lid, but held in a ziplock freezer bag for ease of viewing.

But I’m kind of glad that I didn’t find out about the gift baskets and Sweet Toothfairy goodies and piles of other manifestations-of-devotion that people were giving her till the next day, or I would have been even more embarrassed that night. (Especially as my chocolate penmanship leaves much to be desired. And because after I started writing I realized I wouldn’t have space to write what I wanted to say, so my message was kind of lame. But this didn’t stop me. Unfortunately.)

So back to my DiSPleASuRe. I was standing in the doorway of the gallery where Ree was speaking behind a massive crowd such that I couldn't see her, grousing to the guard who wasn’t letting anyone in about the unsuitability of the venue chosen for such an illustrious author, when all the sudden there was some applause and then much to my surprise, Ree was walking right towards me.

Figuring I wasn’t going to get another chance to be this close to her, I thrust my paltry offering in front of her as she was trying to exit.

“Ree! I’m Blue, and there are a bazillion people here tonight so I’m not going to have a chance to give this to you so I just thought I’d hand it to you now.” (said in a rushed, only slightly intelligible jumble)

Ree (graciously): “Oh, is it fudge?”

Me: “No, it’s English Toffee” (starting to realize it wasn't actually all that brilliant)

Ree, after reading the card said “Oh your BLUE! I didn’t catch that when you first said it.”

Me: “Yeah, I sent you an apple peeler for your birthday (almost 3 years ago).

Ree: “I remember you! Thanks” she said, giving me a hug before heading off to the bookstore for her signing. And I vowed to never wash my outfit again (ala Marsha Brady after meeting Davy Jones).

Of course it was impossible to pause for a photo op; there were mobs of people around, and I’m sure more than a few who felt like I trumped them by happening to be standing right in Ree’s path. But I walked away ebullient and rejoicing that I’d been able to meet her, and that she actually remembered me. Or faked it really well.


Astonishingly, someone I don't know snapped a pic of The Moment and put it on facebook, Then someone I do know stumbled across it and tagged me. So I have this highly flattering photo of me handing my humble toffee card to Ree. That's Missy in the background (her awesome SIL), and her driver in front (not her body guard. Though I suppose he served dual purpose in a way). (But, MAJOR DOWNGRADE from MM, no?!)

Since we weren't getting in, my SIL & I decided to take my nephew out for ice cream and then dinner. In that order. (She's such a fun mom!) Afterward they dropped me back at my car and I figured I'd just head home, but, Confessions of a Blue Woman time, I was bummed.

Yeah, I’d met Ree. Sure she’d even hugged me, and said she remembered me. But I hadn’t been able to get a book signed. And that was what I’d gone there to do. It had all happened so fast!

I had to pass the book shop to get home and right as I did, someone pulled out. So without thinking I turned into their vacated parking spot.

Making my way through the masses milling about outside, I tried to find out what the deal was. Had they decided to issue more tickets? How fast was the line moving? Could I buy a book and get it signed still?

There was a man standing alone and I thought he looked a bit “official”, so I asked him “Are you in charge here or do you have information?”

“Nope” he replied.

Then I noticed he had a bag that said FoxTV.

“Oh, you’re the media”, I said out loud.

His name was Matt, and he was there to interview Ree for the local news. We chatted for a few minutes and then he said “Mind if I ask you a few questions on camera?”

“Uh, sure” I replied, completely caught off guard.

Here's the thing: I’m new at this whole tv thing, my experiences with that Celebrity Chef not withstanding. (That’s a big story for another time).

Matt instructs me to look into his face, not the camera. I’m preoccupied with awareness that I never reapplied my lipgloss, and isn't someone supposed to do my hair and makeup before they go live? I have a hard time not glancing at the bright light shining in my face. I’m suddenly nervous, cause WOW! Being interviewed for tv about REE!

Matt says “Please say and spell your name”

I reply “My name is Blue. B. L. U. E.”

“So why are you here Blue?”

“Well, I’ve been reading Ree’s blog since it was only a few months old…summer of 2006. I wish I could remember how I found it, but I don’t have any idea. So I thought it would be fun to meet her tonight.”

Matt: “What do you like about her blog?

Me: “I love her writing style and how she’s living a life that is completely foreign to most of us. And when you read her blog, you know you’re going to get a quality product…she’s wholesome and family friendly. I like that about her.”

Matt: “How long are you willing to stay here tonight?”

Me: (on camera, mind you) “Well, how long is Ree going to be here? I’m sure she’s more tired than me, so I'm good till the very end.”

Matt: "Anything else you'd like to add?"

And then, there's a teensy weensy chance that I might have said that I'd love to visit her and stay at her lodge sometime, if she ever did a get-together like that again. I'm hoping I just imagined I said that part though, cause, squirm! Self-invite. How tacky! Suddenly I'm like a star-struck teeniebopper...what's that about?

Matt then informed me that my interview might not make it to the tv, because there was some final World Series Baseball Game going on, and it "looked like the Yankee’s might win it". Yeah, my big moment was in jeopardy because of baseball. “But it will be on the web” he assured me.

Well, near as I can tell, it wasn’t on tv, nor did they put it on their website. The link to the story only goes to Ree's blog. Which I already have memorized, cause DUH!

After his interview with Ree (which he didn't have to have a ticket for! Note to self: next time I want insta-access to someone, bring TV Camera and a wear a Logo Shirt.), Matt walked back outside and, as he passed me he said “Ree says hi.”

“Yeah, sure she did” I replied.

“No really. I told her ‘Blue’s still outside’, and she said ‘I know Blue!’”

Now I'd been toying with leaving because at the rate they were moving, I knew it would be at least 3 more hours. And they were sold out of books...so I couldn't even have her sign one. But that cinched it…Ree said "I know Blue"!

I had to wait. And of course I was last in line. So I was free wander around. I got some shawls and snacks to share while I settled in with the other die-hards. Who are all awesome, by the way.

Anyway, the whole reason I’ve even mentioned this incident today is because I am HORRIBLE at thinking on my feet. Horrible! In fact, scientists have discovered that there is a gene that helps people anticipate things and handle them on the fly, and after testing they've informed me that I am missing that gene. As it turns out.

So when I was answering Matt’s questions, I didn’t manage to express why I really read Ree’s blog. It's been on my mind for a week now. And you don't have to stick around and read anymore of this...I know it's like eleventeen pages long already. But...(was that not the longest lead-in EVER!?)

I read ThePioneerWoman.com because I love how positive Ree is. Have you ever heard her genuinely complain about anything? She teases. She is self-deprecating. But she’s always positive.

Ree seems to be very comfortable with who she is, and her choices in life even though it's a life she never dreamed of before she met MM. I never dreamed I'd still be living the student life in my forties, and there are things I haven't handled with as much grace as I'd like to have done. As I read Ree's blog I learn how to be more like I'd like to be. She’s a great role model as a mom, wife, neighbor and friend.

I read because every time I think about her story, I am reminded of just how filled with possibility all of our lives are. I mean, if you had told Ree four years ago that in the next few years she would go from complete and utter anonymity to being a NYT Bestselling author, with tens of thousands of fans and admirers (and minions) I’m sure she’d have laughed and snorted her coffee up her nose.

I read because I have a deep, conscious appreciation for the hard-working farmers and ranchers in the world. These are the people responsible for the fact that my family is well-fed and have never known hunger. They are the ones who wake up before dawn, and work till after dark. And it’s HARD work! I l♥ve our nation’s farmers. I really appreciate all they do. And while there is honor in all honest labor, some jobs are simply more important than others. The world would keep on turning if there weren’t flight attendants. But it would be a vastly different place without our hardworking farmers and ranchers…and every time I read about their lives, I feel grateful to them for the sacrifices they make. I like feeling grateful.

And finally, I am still reading because back when she wasn’t the biggest blogger on the planet (what, you know someone whose bigger?), when she was only getting 10-20 comments per post, I actually harbored secret hopes of becoming good friends with her. She struck me as a worthwhile person to know; down-to-earth and genuine. Our kids would get along great and we’d have a lot of fun just doing nothing. I imagined trekking on down to Pawhuska and hanging out for a spell at her place. After all, I commented on almost every post, and figured with a name like Blue, she’d at least recognize me over time. And then she'd want to be bffs, and I could help her with her fear of flying and she could help me with the whole cooking thing, for example.

But what actually happened was she became wildly popular before we could become real friends. Clearly it wasn't our destiny to be besties, and I have made peace with that. But I still read her thoughts. And I’m still inspired by her “dive in and figure it out” approach to everything (homeschooling, photography, Photoshop, cooking, etc.). Still love her upbeat attitude, how she freely shares her insights/knowledge, and her happy relationships with those around her. Ree still inspires me as a role model for how I’d like to be in some ways as I reinvent myself while working through the hard things in my past.

And THAT, Matt from FoxTV, is what I would have said when you asked me why I read The Pioneer Woman. It's clearly a good thing I'm missing that gene, cause like, major overshare! )

Grateful for:
1) Farmers and ranchers and other vital hard-working people
2) Endless varieties of healthy, tasty food
3) Memory loss. Helps with the embarrassment factor (I should be over this within a month or two.)
4) Gracious people. They're everywhere!